"I am not a PLUS SIZE and I don't see myself as one"

Wow, finally have a chance to update you girls on whats going on with my life. Was having a gathering at my friends place and the men decided to go out to get some 'toys' for their hobby and left the wives and girls alone in the house. During the chat-session, we had a very interesting topic and I would like to share with you girls. A little more about this group of lovely people before I start. These peeps that I hang out with are ALL are plus size (except the husbands). We hang out alot and we are really close to each other, we do not judge each other by the physical appearance and we have each other's back and we literally called one another as 'frenmily'... anyways here goes,

**Disclaimer: On today's topic, our definition of 'plus size' is not our physical body. our definition is on how we FEEL and TREAT ourselves as a 'plus size' 

While chilling and sipping piping hot ginger lemon tea, we were talking about us as individuals being a plus size girl. Then one girl gave a rather intriguing comment. 'I never see myself as a plus size.'

That was it. Sweet and short. Simple one sentence. It certainly raised some eyebrows when she made the comment and I bet you will be raising an eyebrow right now, wondering if she was in denial or she was plain too proud to admit about her physical appearance. But she was quick to explain why she does'nt feel fat or see herself as plus size. Her logic was simple. Because to the many plus size girls especially in Asia, the moment you classify yourself as plus size, you belittle yourself, you give up on yourself and no longer respect and love yourself. You give up on the idea of looking good and looking presentable. You give up the monthly routine of trimming your brows, doing a neat manicure and pedicure or even maintaining clean nails, you give up on the greasy hair that ought to be fixed, you give up on wearing an proper ironed dress or blouse before you head out to work. You just give up on everything!

I really thought hard about what my girlfriend had said to us. Could she have been right? That many plus size girls hate their body so much till they gave up on themselves? If so, are the girlies that I hang out with has never feel that we are 'plus size?' If so, what is the difference between my clique of girlies compared to the other plus size girls? So what could be the problem?

After some serious pondering, I came to a conclusion. It boiled down to 2 things and the is the people you hang out with and how much you love yourself, truly. With the right group of people you hang out with, they will not judge you and will encourage you to do great things and would want you to be happy. They will be your pillar of strength and support whenever you need them. They will give good advice and never put you down, never making you feel ugly and fat. The other element is about loving yourself and your body, wholeheartedly, unconditional. If you ask me, self-love is the hardest love to 'fall in love with' We often are so hard on ourselves, we bash our mind so much and often allow negative things to flow into our brain and torment ourselves, our souls and leave us wounded and insecure many times. Loving yourself takes a lot of courage and you need to be patient on yourself, teach youself to do the right things, think the right way, pamper yourself right, praise yourself that you did great today etc....

I looked around the peers I am with, oh yeah~ they are a really good bunch of 'healthy (to my soul) people' and oh yes, each and everyone of them including myself that we could potentially be different compared to the other 'plus size' because we have so much self love and we love ourselves so much till we do not see ourselves as 'plus size ' at all. What do you think? do you agree with my conclusion? Do you feel like you are a 'plus size'? Do you feel fat? If so, are you going to do something about it? Or just continue to be a 'plus size'?

 I am Kayde and I am a plus size blogger