I have nowhere to write but I need to pen this down. I really want to express how much gratitude I have for your love and support and that you have not let me go. And that you still think there are a way and room to bloom when I am feeling the opposite.
I am very thankful for the support and encouragement and yet I have to brave up to disappoint you. Once again, I am very thankful for the guidance, the love and the belief. I need to do what I need to do and that it is only necessary that this break up has to happen. I really really hate to disappoint people. Period.
In time to come I will be able to speak again, but for now, I wish to lay low at the back scene and try to figure out what I can do to potentially speak to you again.
Once again, I truly appreciate your kind support and belief in me.
Till we meet again.
Monday, 25 June 2018
Thursday, 21 June 2018
Monday, 11 June 2018
Goodbye dear Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain
Last week was tough. I woke up and flipped through IG, I saw a devastating post that Kate Spade has left the world through ending her own life. I felt this immense pain and sadness as I truly liked her as an designer. Although along the history of fashion, colour pop and quirky designs trended in the fashion scene like Mary Quant, I believe Kate Spade is the strongest quirky yet practical brand that surfaced in my 'era' Kate Spade was often my to go to for fashion inspiration and I always love how she stuck true to her design elements which for this case was modern vintage with a nice colour pop. I really appreciate her designing style and that she can make simple silhouettes make it look so beautiful by adding little but striking details in each and every of her piece.
Days later, I found out through a friend that famous chef Anthony Bourdain has passed on by ending his life. He was 61 and I would guess he probably lived a pretty 'ok' life as he was a super famous and sought after chef.
When I read both articles on their sudden death, I freaked out a little. I couldn't understand how a happy rich people with a beautiful family can just end their life like that? There and then, I was transformed to readers like you, thinking about my life being perfect (read the previous post I wrote) Indeed, I assumed they were both happy and 'life was perfect for them' It was then I am reminded that depression is REAL, and it can creep to anyone's life in any possible way. In short, rich also can get depression, middle-income also can be attacked by depression and so are the poor.
Fighting depression alone is not easy and the worst part of all? You cannot tell anyone for you think that they will judge you and push you aside thinking you are crazy (the irony of it!) The problem with depression is that most of us think that it only happens on business people, important people and famous people but in real fact, it can happen to anyone. In the world today, the constant stress and expectations piled on us can be a tad too much for many to bear. Depression can come from anywhere and happen to anyone; from young mother with a little baby to a junior executive who just can't seem to keep up with work and it definitely can stretch to high positions which may include your boss. Depression is a freaky as it does not whack you with visible symptoms, it just weaves in slowly, inch by inch, one day at a time.
Last week was indeed dull and depressing to read about deaths due to depression but I took this opportunity to learn valuable teachings which allows me to understand myself more. I figured that material items like luxury items and fancy houses and cars may indeed feed you for a short while but unless you are truly happy, you will never be able to enjoy these items. I used to be looked down at when I was 18 because ex-boss brought me to good places which required me to smile and chat up with celebrities and famous people. I also shortly joined a luxurious trade of high-end jewellery which you meet really, really REALLY rich people and can never understand 'why are you always the same blouse every time I see you?' I felt much less than them and got angry. I got to a point where I wanted to prove a point so much till I lost control of my spendings. I am extremely thankful that Mr Ling came into my life and taught me the real reason to live and be able to live. I resisted and fought but eventually found inner peace through his strict teachings and him not spoiling me.
I know I definitely have tendency to slip into depression but I know I am not the only one. But I make effort to find solution by finding someone I trust to constantly talk to and never be judged by my words. Whenever Mr Ling chooses to shut his ears and think I am cray cray, I will immediately call to my besties for support and just by meeting up and rant, I feel much better.
The purpose of this post is to remind you that it is certainly okay to admit that you have depressed tendencies and constantly seeking for happiness but you can never understand how to find it. IT IS NORMAL okay? Just make sure you be open minded and speak to someone and listen to soothing meditation music and take baby steps to self heal. Depression is a long journey but never THE journey as we can overcome it! Remember that whatever that is bothering you, may it be physical health or mental, be open to talk about it.
I know I can do it and I will continue to work on it! And I manifest that you will overcome it too and that you are reminded that life is more than and that you are too precious to not fully utilize your fullest potential!
Love
K
Days later, I found out through a friend that famous chef Anthony Bourdain has passed on by ending his life. He was 61 and I would guess he probably lived a pretty 'ok' life as he was a super famous and sought after chef.
When I read both articles on their sudden death, I freaked out a little. I couldn't understand how a happy rich people with a beautiful family can just end their life like that? There and then, I was transformed to readers like you, thinking about my life being perfect (read the previous post I wrote) Indeed, I assumed they were both happy and 'life was perfect for them' It was then I am reminded that depression is REAL, and it can creep to anyone's life in any possible way. In short, rich also can get depression, middle-income also can be attacked by depression and so are the poor.
Fighting depression alone is not easy and the worst part of all? You cannot tell anyone for you think that they will judge you and push you aside thinking you are crazy (the irony of it!) The problem with depression is that most of us think that it only happens on business people, important people and famous people but in real fact, it can happen to anyone. In the world today, the constant stress and expectations piled on us can be a tad too much for many to bear. Depression can come from anywhere and happen to anyone; from young mother with a little baby to a junior executive who just can't seem to keep up with work and it definitely can stretch to high positions which may include your boss. Depression is a freaky as it does not whack you with visible symptoms, it just weaves in slowly, inch by inch, one day at a time.
Last week was indeed dull and depressing to read about deaths due to depression but I took this opportunity to learn valuable teachings which allows me to understand myself more. I figured that material items like luxury items and fancy houses and cars may indeed feed you for a short while but unless you are truly happy, you will never be able to enjoy these items. I used to be looked down at when I was 18 because ex-boss brought me to good places which required me to smile and chat up with celebrities and famous people. I also shortly joined a luxurious trade of high-end jewellery which you meet really, really REALLY rich people and can never understand 'why are you always the same blouse every time I see you?' I felt much less than them and got angry. I got to a point where I wanted to prove a point so much till I lost control of my spendings. I am extremely thankful that Mr Ling came into my life and taught me the real reason to live and be able to live. I resisted and fought but eventually found inner peace through his strict teachings and him not spoiling me.
I know I definitely have tendency to slip into depression but I know I am not the only one. But I make effort to find solution by finding someone I trust to constantly talk to and never be judged by my words. Whenever Mr Ling chooses to shut his ears and think I am cray cray, I will immediately call to my besties for support and just by meeting up and rant, I feel much better.
The purpose of this post is to remind you that it is certainly okay to admit that you have depressed tendencies and constantly seeking for happiness but you can never understand how to find it. IT IS NORMAL okay? Just make sure you be open minded and speak to someone and listen to soothing meditation music and take baby steps to self heal. Depression is a long journey but never THE journey as we can overcome it! Remember that whatever that is bothering you, may it be physical health or mental, be open to talk about it.
I know I can do it and I will continue to work on it! And I manifest that you will overcome it too and that you are reminded that life is more than and that you are too precious to not fully utilize your fullest potential!
Love
K
Tuesday, 5 June 2018
Negative Vibe
It is indeed a while since I have done a post and last checked was more than 2 years ago. I have been trying to get back to blogging for a while now as nudged by my fellow colleague as they felt that many ladies missed this connection I used to have with them. I honestly have many drafts in my blogspot but I could not post them up as they were negative and I fiercely fought back because I wanted to keep the 'happy blessed Kayde' image that most of you have. But tonight was different and I spoke briefly to Mr Ling if expressing this heartfelt blogpost is acceptable. This man is super sweet . He agreed that it is good to vent and let out some steam once in a while but of course, his final words before he started snoring was 'do not include anything that is hurtful to anyone and spare a thought for people who read this post'
I wanted to sleep over this feeling but I kept tossing and turning on the bed since 9pm and forced myself to sleep but I really couldn't. It has been a while since I felt this uncontrollable negative energy filling up my mind. Like you, I thought after the long holiday with beautiful scenery and skies and sea would make me feel energised and hopeful but it only lasted less than a week before I got overwhelmed with the current situation I am back before I left for the trip. What exactly am I talking about, you may ask and to make things simple for you, I am going to make it short and sweet.
I know this may sound nothing to you but to those who have gone through this business journey with me might grasp for air due to shock and disbelief. I know right? How can this be possible? Isn't everything great and Kayde's life is so perfect! How can she be sick of the business?
The truth is that during this short period of 2 to 3 years, I have unknowingly got entwined with a lot of major (in my opinion) business-related decisions, business strategy decisions which are much larger scale than 10 years ago. I got ambitious and I got excited, thinking that I can do and dress up more people along the way and that my business will be made known for dressing curvy ladies locally and internationally. I kept thinking that my main goal in life is to be able to dress as many curvy ladies worldwide (hence the logo *wink wink.. *) As I scaled up, I hired more people to assist me and the next you knew, you have a freaking awesome team behind you. In terms of designs, we have expanded and explored so many new techniques that we have never even dare to dream and we got a big spacious prime location to reach out to more people and tourists. There were more beautiful and pretty things happened in these short years and I guess I got to say, we were really happy and full of positive energy, believing that we can achieve what we have set.
Unfortunately, no one knew there was an ugly side of the business. Commitments grew bigger and stressed downloaded on me, forcing me to make decisions every other day and sometimes I questioned myself if I am a good employer. I got judged in character and it really stings at times because I know if it was years back, I am sure I can handle it way better. It certainly did not help when I totally lost control of my business forecasts which I was really good in with the uncertain market. I fought fiercely for a good 8 months before finally getting things on track and just when I thought I can smile and whistle a nice tune, I began to feel more burden and more stress from everywhere. I slowly begin to be angry with myself that I am not good enough with my designs (i am extremely critical of myself in terms of designs) and every positive feedback would sound like criticism and the words filled my brains and my night. I used to be really confident on how to handle business matters but as the business grew, I lost my balance and constantly finding myself losing focus as I had too much to deal with and work on. It was after weeks of self reflection and being honest with myself, I concluded that I no longer have to the faith to carry the Kaylene torch and bring it to greater heights. There were days where I just want to drop it and 'why bother to help others when you can even help yourself' It sounds harsh and sad but at this point of time, I felt that this torch is way too heavy for me and the flames on this burning torch are blinding my sight.
In the office, I spoke briefly to two of my trusted colleagues. They were quick to identify that I am indeed burned out but they were also curious why I openly talked about being burned out AFTER a trip while many do the opposite. I guess the only reason to this is that I have truly come to terms with accepting myself and my limitations during this long trip. It is painful for a proud person like myself to acknowledge my shortcoming but I guess I have to embrace this ugly fact so that I can move next to healing myself and change to be a better person.
The funny thing is that I am often told that I am one of the luckiest people in the world. I truly agree and thank God for the blessings I received but to be considered the happiest person is something I tend to shrug and frown. The truth is I don't feel happy of late due to stress and I find it extremely hard to get my smile back (yes, not even having my sis to tempt into getting me a beautiful piece of jewelry could make me smile and I AM quite a sucker for jewelry)
I really am unsure what the future holds for Kaylene as this brand is literally my blood. Losing this brand will take everything from me and I will fight till the end in order to protect this child of mine. But I am aware of my tired body and I know fighting against the current is useless unless I figure a way to steer this business in another way. I did arrange some major shifts to the business and I believe we will see the results in a few months time. Until then, I really hope I can keep my head high and continue to nurture this baby I have since 2007 and I must say, after typing this, I felt much better (well, at least better than writing business emails!)
I apologise to you reading this now and probably kena some negative vibe from me. This post was much needed and served me as a reminder that I finally lost the battle of being 'strong' and in hope that in days to come when I am reading this again, I will be reminded on how lost I was and how I managed to overcome it. I hope to bounce back in the quickest time. For now, it is a good vent and I believe after shutting down this lappie, I can go get some good rest.
Thank you for reading, it means alot to me.
Xoxo
K
I wanted to sleep over this feeling but I kept tossing and turning on the bed since 9pm and forced myself to sleep but I really couldn't. It has been a while since I felt this uncontrollable negative energy filling up my mind. Like you, I thought after the long holiday with beautiful scenery and skies and sea would make me feel energised and hopeful but it only lasted less than a week before I got overwhelmed with the current situation I am back before I left for the trip. What exactly am I talking about, you may ask and to make things simple for you, I am going to make it short and sweet.
I no longer am in love with Kaylene, a 10 year old business which I built from nothing to something. I am starting to lose the connection for this business and it is even sadder because I am unsure why I feel this neagtive way.
I know this may sound nothing to you but to those who have gone through this business journey with me might grasp for air due to shock and disbelief. I know right? How can this be possible? Isn't everything great and Kayde's life is so perfect! How can she be sick of the business?
The truth is that during this short period of 2 to 3 years, I have unknowingly got entwined with a lot of major (in my opinion) business-related decisions, business strategy decisions which are much larger scale than 10 years ago. I got ambitious and I got excited, thinking that I can do and dress up more people along the way and that my business will be made known for dressing curvy ladies locally and internationally. I kept thinking that my main goal in life is to be able to dress as many curvy ladies worldwide (hence the logo *wink wink.. *) As I scaled up, I hired more people to assist me and the next you knew, you have a freaking awesome team behind you. In terms of designs, we have expanded and explored so many new techniques that we have never even dare to dream and we got a big spacious prime location to reach out to more people and tourists. There were more beautiful and pretty things happened in these short years and I guess I got to say, we were really happy and full of positive energy, believing that we can achieve what we have set.
Unfortunately, no one knew there was an ugly side of the business. Commitments grew bigger and stressed downloaded on me, forcing me to make decisions every other day and sometimes I questioned myself if I am a good employer. I got judged in character and it really stings at times because I know if it was years back, I am sure I can handle it way better. It certainly did not help when I totally lost control of my business forecasts which I was really good in with the uncertain market. I fought fiercely for a good 8 months before finally getting things on track and just when I thought I can smile and whistle a nice tune, I began to feel more burden and more stress from everywhere. I slowly begin to be angry with myself that I am not good enough with my designs (i am extremely critical of myself in terms of designs) and every positive feedback would sound like criticism and the words filled my brains and my night. I used to be really confident on how to handle business matters but as the business grew, I lost my balance and constantly finding myself losing focus as I had too much to deal with and work on. It was after weeks of self reflection and being honest with myself, I concluded that I no longer have to the faith to carry the Kaylene torch and bring it to greater heights. There were days where I just want to drop it and 'why bother to help others when you can even help yourself' It sounds harsh and sad but at this point of time, I felt that this torch is way too heavy for me and the flames on this burning torch are blinding my sight.
In the office, I spoke briefly to two of my trusted colleagues. They were quick to identify that I am indeed burned out but they were also curious why I openly talked about being burned out AFTER a trip while many do the opposite. I guess the only reason to this is that I have truly come to terms with accepting myself and my limitations during this long trip. It is painful for a proud person like myself to acknowledge my shortcoming but I guess I have to embrace this ugly fact so that I can move next to healing myself and change to be a better person.
The funny thing is that I am often told that I am one of the luckiest people in the world. I truly agree and thank God for the blessings I received but to be considered the happiest person is something I tend to shrug and frown. The truth is I don't feel happy of late due to stress and I find it extremely hard to get my smile back (yes, not even having my sis to tempt into getting me a beautiful piece of jewelry could make me smile and I AM quite a sucker for jewelry)
I really am unsure what the future holds for Kaylene as this brand is literally my blood. Losing this brand will take everything from me and I will fight till the end in order to protect this child of mine. But I am aware of my tired body and I know fighting against the current is useless unless I figure a way to steer this business in another way. I did arrange some major shifts to the business and I believe we will see the results in a few months time. Until then, I really hope I can keep my head high and continue to nurture this baby I have since 2007 and I must say, after typing this, I felt much better (well, at least better than writing business emails!)
I apologise to you reading this now and probably kena some negative vibe from me. This post was much needed and served me as a reminder that I finally lost the battle of being 'strong' and in hope that in days to come when I am reading this again, I will be reminded on how lost I was and how I managed to overcome it. I hope to bounce back in the quickest time. For now, it is a good vent and I believe after shutting down this lappie, I can go get some good rest.
Thank you for reading, it means alot to me.
Xoxo
K
Sunday, 26 June 2016
Why I (and the other 4) chose to 'Bang Against The Wall'
Hello ladies! Its been a while (i know i know... guilty as charged) since I last wrote but its been a tad busy for me... with lull economy times like this, I need to work extremely harder than before to ensure I get to pay my girls and foot the rent... Running a business is not easy and it is not just getting a space and take stock and sell clothes. It is more than that if you need to ensure that you can thrive in the business. IT is a lot of hard work and get loads of criticism and backlash and improve and progress... those who are in the same trade as me will truly understand what I am talking about...
And just when I am increasing my momentum for my business (i never stop, in fact I work more than ever) my 4 other girls namely Prissy, Cate, Jenah and Karen decided to launch a closed group for you curvy ladies namely, 'Curvysta - Because theres a Star in You'
Many people came towards me and even my friends and told them how dumb and silly it is to form a group for curvy ladies as this is not money making. It is time consuming, sucks our energy and at times we have to fork out our own money for miscellaneous items. Many told me straight in the face that I am 'woah, you are so big hearted but in a way you are dumb' and I know my other 4 girlies got similar backlash too but really, We WANT TO DO IT, willingly - period.
The 5 of us came together by chance since 2010 and we hang out pretty much often. Of course, some came and go and that left the 5 of us now. Of course we fight and we wish to can smack each others brains once in a while BUT we realised that despite our DIFFERENCES, we really have a common goal and that is we want to GIVE BACK TO the curvy ladies and we REALLY WANT TO SERVE. I was once mocked for being 'snake' and that I have hidden agenda when Curvysta was launched. I didnt need to even reply that comment for I know deep down I stand tall, am dignified and I shouldnt fear. We also have naggy loved ones who told us to not be so involved because taking a bus to source for location 'also cost money and Curvysta is not paying you' but WE REALLY WANT TO DO IT, period. I once heard from other source that we were criticised for choosing to be in groups and we shouldnt be choosing people and make them into our group. But then the truth is: We didnt! We sincerely welcome curvy ladies to come join us!
So what is Curvysta all about?
Curvysta is founded by 5 like-minded FAT ladies who wish to give back WILLINGLY to the other curvy ladies. We know how it TRULY feels to be criticised EVERYDAY by family and friends for being fat and lazy and beyond hope. We believe that every curvy girl despite size OUGHT to be happy inside and beautiful outside. We believe that by bonding and gathering, we can share positive vibes and share the pain together should there be a need to. Curvysta is all about LOVE, POSITIVE ATTITUDE, SHARING, CARING and KEEPING IN TOUCH. We do create events (the first 3 was an awesome success!) and we will continue to keep doing it until we get it right! It is definitely not about making money! (as I am typing this I am getting annoyed... calm as a clam... ohmmmm kayde-oooohm) Each of us runs a business or has a dedicated job and one of us (not me) runs a family business that speaks millions. I am very happy with my Kaylene business and I am thriving well, really ladies... I couldnt understand why we are suspected to launch Curvysta with a hidden agenda. Okay.. maybe we do have a agenda and that is:
We want Curvysta to grow well and prosper in terms of the number of members and that we will constantly meet up and find new friendship and share our joy and positive lights. We want all members to find peace within oneself and that life is more than the physical appearance. We want Curvysta to grow in to big numbers so that we can support one another and network together in all parts of Singapore. We want to create a group where when we cross the road and see another curvy lady, we greet each other with a smile or a high 5 instead of having heads down and not looking up.
So there, right now Curvysta is a baby and has 600 over members (great job admins!) and we are very strict in this group. We do not sell products (yet) and do not promote anything. We have hawk eyes whenever we have members awaiting to be approved. We are that serious in making sure you girls get a safe environment. (that said, if anyone cheats and foul play, let us know we will block them) the 5 of us are very comforted by the numbers and we know it can get only better. Do come and support this group by supporting events that we organise! These are our fuel and energy booster and remind us that all the calls we make, all the site recce, all the emails we sent out are worthwhile because you girls will get to enjoy the events. That is really what we are asking for and this is really what we want to do and that is 'TO SERVE'. The admins recently got deflated by the lack of response for the Yoga class (ironically theres more people asking on whens the next one since the 1st is cancelled) and I spoke to Mr Ling about my fears on failing to pull through Curvysta. He calmly replied:' Just keep doing. Even if it is just 1 person who turns up. Just keep doing until it becomes 10 and till it becomes 100..' woah... what a positive man injecting positive vibe to the low-morale wife... I got up shortly after and sent text to the other 4 to remind them to keep our heads up! All replied with positive response and yup, we are ready to rock and roll again!
So now ladies, I have officially introduced Curvysta (i know it is a tad too late!) and the 5 admins sincerely hope you will join us and be part of a new family that has nothing but joy, love and positive vibes.
To join us and find out the next event (painting and tea session!) click the following to join us!
****CLICK BELOW TO JOIN US AND MEET ON 10th JULY for PAINTING AND TEA SESSION!****
https://www.facebook.com/groups/1730585360508735
And just when I am increasing my momentum for my business (i never stop, in fact I work more than ever) my 4 other girls namely Prissy, Cate, Jenah and Karen decided to launch a closed group for you curvy ladies namely, 'Curvysta - Because theres a Star in You'
Many people came towards me and even my friends and told them how dumb and silly it is to form a group for curvy ladies as this is not money making. It is time consuming, sucks our energy and at times we have to fork out our own money for miscellaneous items. Many told me straight in the face that I am 'woah, you are so big hearted but in a way you are dumb' and I know my other 4 girlies got similar backlash too but really, We WANT TO DO IT, willingly - period.
The 5 of us came together by chance since 2010 and we hang out pretty much often. Of course, some came and go and that left the 5 of us now. Of course we fight and we wish to can smack each others brains once in a while BUT we realised that despite our DIFFERENCES, we really have a common goal and that is we want to GIVE BACK TO the curvy ladies and we REALLY WANT TO SERVE. I was once mocked for being 'snake' and that I have hidden agenda when Curvysta was launched. I didnt need to even reply that comment for I know deep down I stand tall, am dignified and I shouldnt fear. We also have naggy loved ones who told us to not be so involved because taking a bus to source for location 'also cost money and Curvysta is not paying you' but WE REALLY WANT TO DO IT, period. I once heard from other source that we were criticised for choosing to be in groups and we shouldnt be choosing people and make them into our group. But then the truth is: We didnt! We sincerely welcome curvy ladies to come join us!
So what is Curvysta all about?
Curvysta is founded by 5 like-minded FAT ladies who wish to give back WILLINGLY to the other curvy ladies. We know how it TRULY feels to be criticised EVERYDAY by family and friends for being fat and lazy and beyond hope. We believe that every curvy girl despite size OUGHT to be happy inside and beautiful outside. We believe that by bonding and gathering, we can share positive vibes and share the pain together should there be a need to. Curvysta is all about LOVE, POSITIVE ATTITUDE, SHARING, CARING and KEEPING IN TOUCH. We do create events (the first 3 was an awesome success!) and we will continue to keep doing it until we get it right! It is definitely not about making money! (as I am typing this I am getting annoyed... calm as a clam... ohmmmm kayde-oooohm) Each of us runs a business or has a dedicated job and one of us (not me) runs a family business that speaks millions. I am very happy with my Kaylene business and I am thriving well, really ladies... I couldnt understand why we are suspected to launch Curvysta with a hidden agenda. Okay.. maybe we do have a agenda and that is:
We want Curvysta to grow well and prosper in terms of the number of members and that we will constantly meet up and find new friendship and share our joy and positive lights. We want all members to find peace within oneself and that life is more than the physical appearance. We want Curvysta to grow in to big numbers so that we can support one another and network together in all parts of Singapore. We want to create a group where when we cross the road and see another curvy lady, we greet each other with a smile or a high 5 instead of having heads down and not looking up.
So there, right now Curvysta is a baby and has 600 over members (great job admins!) and we are very strict in this group. We do not sell products (yet) and do not promote anything. We have hawk eyes whenever we have members awaiting to be approved. We are that serious in making sure you girls get a safe environment. (that said, if anyone cheats and foul play, let us know we will block them) the 5 of us are very comforted by the numbers and we know it can get only better. Do come and support this group by supporting events that we organise! These are our fuel and energy booster and remind us that all the calls we make, all the site recce, all the emails we sent out are worthwhile because you girls will get to enjoy the events. That is really what we are asking for and this is really what we want to do and that is 'TO SERVE'. The admins recently got deflated by the lack of response for the Yoga class (ironically theres more people asking on whens the next one since the 1st is cancelled) and I spoke to Mr Ling about my fears on failing to pull through Curvysta. He calmly replied:' Just keep doing. Even if it is just 1 person who turns up. Just keep doing until it becomes 10 and till it becomes 100..' woah... what a positive man injecting positive vibe to the low-morale wife... I got up shortly after and sent text to the other 4 to remind them to keep our heads up! All replied with positive response and yup, we are ready to rock and roll again!
So now ladies, I have officially introduced Curvysta (i know it is a tad too late!) and the 5 admins sincerely hope you will join us and be part of a new family that has nothing but joy, love and positive vibes.
To join us and find out the next event (painting and tea session!) click the following to join us!
https://www.facebook.com/groups/1730585360508735
Tuesday, 19 April 2016
Always something.... to be thankful for
This is something I truly believe and manifest in...
Been 'spying' (not really la, they popped up on my FB wall) and noticed some ladies here are kinda depressed over something. It can be tough to face the reality and hard to put on that genuine smile.. but listen! There is always bound to have something to look forward to and be thankful for.
- What about the upcoming holiday you have saved up for months and finally going to experience some cool air?
- What about the gathering you and your girles have planned for to binge on that SUPER DUPER yummy food
- What about knowing someone you know will be discharged soon from hospital?
- What about knowing the parcel you ordered will soon arrive at your door step?
- What about knowing that your little poochie will welcome you wholeheartedly the moment you get home?
The list is long and toooooo long! We need to feel at peace and manifest good things in life. It is only then, you will only be able to find true happiness. After seeing the individual FB postings, the admins and I are even more determined to make Curvysta be successful and in hope we can change 1 or 2 'depressed' lady.
but while we are gearing towards that, we need to remind ourselves that there is ALWAYS ALWAYS something to be thankful for.
I honestly did not start out to be like this. I am a pessimistic and gawd... I find all ways to be upset. I am upset with my flat hair, I am upset with my small eyes, no dimple. I am upset with my double chin. I am even am upset with why my house is not like my gfs which is super neat and cosy. Then I realised something, OMG.... all these things I am upset about are manifested by me! It is true! Why so? It is because if I am upset with my hair, I can simply go to a hair salon and go a revamp hair cut, i have small eyes yes, but I failed to see how caucasions find my eyes exotic and unique! I have messy home because I did not come up with a system to clean my house! Everything started from me due to my pessimistic attitude! So what I do NOW is that I tend to find different angles to look at things and be happy about it! I must add though, that you need to be in the right group of people as they will help you gear towards positivity. This is important and when you start to sense they are more of a poison to you, you need to slowly take a step back, away from them...
It is a lot of work for beginners to feel positive and be happy about everything! But we try and we give ourselves some time to be a new person... I am alot more positive these days and I remind myself by reading loads of happy quotes and books and I think it helps! So come ladies! Try your best in finding an angle to be happy about today! What about mine you may ask? Mine's simple, I am thankful that I can sweat so much in just typing on this warm day. No seriously, I need to sweat out those water retention due to the meds and for this, I am REALLY thankful....
It is a lot of work for beginners to feel positive and be happy about everything! But we try and we give ourselves some time to be a new person... I am alot more positive these days and I remind myself by reading loads of happy quotes and books and I think it helps! So come ladies! Try your best in finding an angle to be happy about today! What about mine you may ask? Mine's simple, I am thankful that I can sweat so much in just typing on this warm day. No seriously, I need to sweat out those water retention due to the meds and for this, I am REALLY thankful....
Friday, 18 March 2016
Good morning ladies! Happy weekend is finally here isnt it?
Yesterday while driving to work, I turned up my favourite playlist and a particular song caught my attention. The song is 'Brave by Sara Bareilles'
I have a tendency to download songs that will remind/have a positive impact once I hear the songs. Last year was an extremely tough year for me and this song was one of the few songs tt I kept listening to in order to keep my spirits up.
Back to the car ride, I often wonder how it is for any curvy ladies to be able to withstand bully and stigma and constantly being joked at just because we are different in size. I get that alot from my slim friends and they kept laughing at me, telling me that it is just a joke and theres no harm to their 'fatty' jokes. I used to laugh it off but now I don't. I will nicely tell them that if they treat me as a friend, they ought to look beyond my physical size and look and TALK TO ME from inside. The real Kayde is NICE and REAL and LOVABLE, look past the size and then talk to me again, will you still say 'fatty jokes' again? I made my point nicely and confidently and often they finally understood what they did was hurtful instead of being cheeky (trust me, most of them do not know that they were being hurtful, they just thought it is funny, but we are better than that, we are classy and magnimanous)
Back to the song, I hope this is in your favourite play list as this song reminds me that in all areas in life, from work to personal to family etc, be brave and tell them how you feel. Even if you do not wish to tell them or explain, be brave FOR YOURSELF, calm your heart and tell yourself that it is okay and you can do better than them. Forgive them as they do not know you and your body well enough. Be brave and face the world again for the time on earth is pretty limited.
And here goes the lyrics, do take a read! I find it so meaningful...
You can be amazing
You can turn a phrase into a weapon or a drug
You can be the outcast
Or be the backlash of somebody's lack of love
Or you can start speaking up
Nothing's gonna hurt you the way that words do
And they settle 'neath your skin
Kept on the inside and no sunlight
Sometimes a shadow wins
But I wonder what would happen if you
You can turn a phrase into a weapon or a drug
You can be the outcast
Or be the backlash of somebody's lack of love
Or you can start speaking up
Nothing's gonna hurt you the way that words do
And they settle 'neath your skin
Kept on the inside and no sunlight
Sometimes a shadow wins
But I wonder what would happen if you
Say what you wanna say
And let the words fall out
Honestly I wanna see you be brave
And let the words fall out
Honestly I wanna see you be brave
With what you want to say
And let the words fall out
Honestly I wanna see you be brave
And let the words fall out
Honestly I wanna see you be brave
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I wanna see you be brave
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I wanna see you be brave
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I wanna see you be brave
Everybody's been there, everybody's been stared down
By the enemy
Fallen for the fear and done some disappearing
Bow down to the mighty
Don't run, stop holding your tongue
Maybe there's a way out of the cage where you live
Maybe one of these days you can let the light in
Show me how big your brave is
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I wanna see you be brave
Everybody's been there, everybody's been stared down
By the enemy
Fallen for the fear and done some disappearing
Bow down to the mighty
Don't run, stop holding your tongue
Maybe there's a way out of the cage where you live
Maybe one of these days you can let the light in
Show me how big your brave is
Say what you wanna say
And let the words fall out
Honestly I wanna see you be brave
And let the words fall out
Honestly I wanna see you be brave
With what you want to say
And let the words fall out
Honestly I wanna see you be brave
And let the words fall out
Honestly I wanna see you be brave
Innocence, your history of silence
Won't do you any good
Did you think it would?
Let your words be anything but empty
Why don't you tell them the truth?
Won't do you any good
Did you think it would?
Let your words be anything but empty
Why don't you tell them the truth?
Say what you wanna say
And let the words fall out
Honestly I wanna see you be brave
And let the words fall out
Honestly I wanna see you be brave
With what you want to say
And let the words fall out
Honestly I wanna see you be brave
And let the words fall out
Honestly I wanna see you be brave
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I wanna see you be brave
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I wanna see you be brave
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
See you be brave
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
See you be brave
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
Everybody's been there, everybody's been stared down
By the enemy
Fallen for the fear and done some disappearing
Bow down to the mighty
Don't run, stop holding your tongue
Maybe there's a way out of the cage where you live
Maybe one of these days you can let the light in
Show me how big your brave is
By the enemy
Fallen for the fear and done some disappearing
Bow down to the mighty
Don't run, stop holding your tongue
Maybe there's a way out of the cage where you live
Maybe one of these days you can let the light in
Show me how big your brave is
Say what you wanna say
And let the words fall out
Honestly I wanna see you be brave
And let the words fall out
Honestly I wanna see you be brave
With what you want to say
And let the words fall out
Honestly I wanna see you be brave
And let the words fall out
Honestly I wanna see you be brave
Innocence, your history of silence
Won't do you any good
Did you think it would?
Let your words be anything but empty
Why don't you tell them the truth?
Won't do you any good
Did you think it would?
Let your words be anything but empty
Why don't you tell them the truth?
Say what you wanna say
And let the words fall out
Honestly I wanna see you be brave
And let the words fall out
Honestly I wanna see you be brave
With what you want to say
And let the words fall out
Honestly I wanna see you be brave
And let the words fall out
Honestly I wanna see you be brave
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I wanna see you be brave
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I wanna see you be brave
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
See you be brave
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
See you be brave
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
Is there songs that you have heard and find it inspiring? Tell us and we can always share! I have alot of songs in my playlist about reminding me to be grounded and true to myself, what about you? Share it with us! After all, this is a place where we ought to share nothing but good things!
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